Not sure where else to turn to but I'm extremely embarrassed to say we're nearing the 1 year anniversary of my Feb graduation (*course 6*) and I'm still unemployed, to the dismay of me and my family. I've applied to hundreds of jobs, tailored my resume with tech folks who regularly hire, tailored cover letters, gotten referrals, spoken to relevant connections in my network, done really well in interviews, all to no avail. The feedback I've received from asking employers who rejected me is never something wrong about me, just that they found someone else with pre-existing experience in that particular industry or tech stack. How am I supposed to compete with that at an entry level? And the longer I go without work, the worse it gets in the eyes of employers. I have two internships from back in undergrad as my "work experience" but that's it, one at a known company and one at a startup. My personal projects were not super intensive unfortunately, but I'm not sure how much that's affecting me at this point. Given the way things are going in the world, I remove certain tech sectors from consideration, but I really don't think that should be a handicap.
I knew the job market was bad going into it, but recently, I've genuinely fallen into depression. It feels like I was sold this lie that the MIT name would open doors previously inaccessible to me, but nothing seems to be helping me land a job. Sucks more when I run into old friends who can't even hide their shock that I'm still unemployed. So I have to pretend this is just a gap year and all part of the plan. I'm starting to come to terms with the fact that I might never work in industry as a *software engineer or in tech*, and that sucks! Maybe it's already time for a career change, I don't know to what. I never felt too good about myself at MIT compared to others and so this all feels like proof that I'm not skilled enough to work in my chosen field.
I can't even do my hobbies with all this free time because I spend a lot of it applying to jobs, doomscrolling, and sulking. I am really grateful that I was able to move back home with my parents. I think they were happy to have me back for a bit. But now I'm starting to feel like a drag and burden, especially as the *middle child sister* who’s just… there. I feel like a firework that exploded in bursts of color (everyone ooed and ah-ed), and then... nothing. I'm considering starting some volunteer/side projects, but persistently, in the back of my mind, is this voice telling me I'm worthless because I can't make any money. I am a failure.
When external structure disappears, you must replace it with internal structure. Keep a fixed daily routine. Get up at the same time every day and go to bed at the same time every night, regardless of mood or circumstances. Plan for eight hours of sleep. Treat this as non-negotiable.
Take care of your body. Exercise regularly, even if it feels pointless at first. Eat properly. These are not self-help platitudes; they are basic maintenance requirements for keeping your mind functional under prolonged stress.
Be very strict with digital consumption. Doomscrolling and sulking are forms of digital procrastination and they actively worsen the situation. Before switching on the TV, unlocking your smartphone, or engaging with any social media, do 20 push-ups. Every time. If you cannot do push-ups, replace them with squats or another short physical exercise. The goal is to insert friction and break the automatic habit loop.
Do not lie to your friends about your situation. That usually makes things worse over time, not better. People talk, and they already know more than you think anyway.
If you cannot find a job in tech right now, apply to other jobs you can realistically get. Any job. Then become very good at it. Be dependable, knowledgeable, and reliable.
At the same time, actively look for better opportunities. Treat this as an ongoing process, not something that passively happens to you. Apply, network, learn, and reposition yourself continuously. Your loyalty is first to yourself, second to your family, and then to the people you care about, never to an employer. When you find a better opportunity, take it. Change jobs if needed. Repeat.
This is not a judgment on your abilities. It is a rational response to current conditions.
My suggestion is to look at networking events and see if you can get involved in startups. You will be talking to people on the team and it's a good way to make connections.
I'd also look into the Education sector (i.e. colleges, universities, school districts) It's how I managed to get my start in tech. https://www.higheredjobs.com
And don't feel bad about it taking a while to find a job. I graduated a few years ago and it took me 6 months to get something lined up. The market is weird right now.
Look into a trade. Technically-inclined like electricity, industrial automation, and so on.
EDIT: Building a startup gets you experience, connections and the grit that comes with actually building something. Being employee #440,670 does not; the end game is promotion or getting laid off. Just telling you how it is.
Unless you want to be in research (which the school does matter) instead of applying for jobs, just build a startup instead which gets you the experience you are looking for.